Thursday, May 31, 2007

Shout out to Teresa Paulina

If you haven't seen it already, go check out this story about the upcoming WIZARDING WORLD OF HARRY POTTER.

Should we start planning a road trip for 2009????


Wednesday, May 30, 2007

I am ... rooted in yesterday,
When I should be... embracing the here and now.

I am ... holding onto hurt, anger and disappointment,
When I should be... practicing forgiveness and offering love.

I am ... yearning for what I don't have,
When I should be... rejoicing in the treasure that surrounds me.

I am... searching for faults, both his and my own,
When I should be... admiring strengths, encouraging accomplishments, and
praising achievements.

I am... clinging to regret and mourning unrealized dreams,
When I should be... looking towards the future with hope and excitement.

I am... indulging in self-pity,
When I should be... LIVING!

Ruth Speaks Up (C) 2007

Monday, May 28, 2007

Memorial Day in Ohio... a photo essay

Where are we headed to again?

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day... the Bacon, Egg & Cheese Bagel is like crack to me...

We live just a few miles from the National Museum of the United States Air Force. The boy LOVES this place, and bonus - admission is free. Unfortunately, there aren't really any pictures of the boy from today, because he won't stand still long enough right now for you to actually take his picture. It really is an extensive and impressive museum. If you're ever in Ohio and close to Dayton, you should take the time to see it.

Don't ask me what the names of any of these planes are. With a 3-year old in tow, there's no time to stop and write down the information.

The museum also includes part of a traveling exhibit on the Holocaust...

And, of course, you can't take a trip to the Air Force Museum without seeing the rockets...

On the opposite end of town is a working historical farm from the 1800's. Some of the buildings are from the original farm, and some are reconstructed.

Now we're home. I'm about to hop on the elliptical (joy, joy), then we're having pizza. Ahh... the excitement of it all...

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

I am sabotaging my marriage.

I've come to this conclusion on my own. . . well, with the help of the counseling, of course, but don't think that either the husband or the counselor has laid this at my feet. In thinking about all this stuff that we have to think about after each counseling session, and all the things we have to write down, and doing all of that openly and willingly and being very honest about it, I've come to this conclusion on my own.

I'm so disappointed with the way things have turned out with my life, that I'm sabotaging my marriage. I'm bitter and spiteful about so many things, and I lay the blame for all of this squarely on the shoulders of my husband.

How awful is that?

I hate my job. I would love to go back to school, but that's out of the question right now because he's out of work and in school, and there's no money, and there's health insurance to consider (which I now carry, because he has no job), and it's doubtful that I'll even be able to go back to school when he's finished, because I'm sure he won't find a job making nearly what I am (not that I make a lot, but it's decent). So the more-likely scenario is that we'll hope for him to find a part-time job in his new career field, which will (hopefully) make getting the precious boy to and from school (he's enrolled in PRESCHOOL for the fall - OH MY GOD!!!! But that's another post.) and all that...

... which leads us directly into the fact that HE'S getting to stay home with the boy for these two years, while he's in school, and all I've had, really, is the measly, completely inadequate six-weeks of maternity leave 3 1/2 years ago. He ends up watching television most of the day, while Daddy tries to study. I'm paranoid that his brain is already mush and that he'll end up with Autism. We're NOWHERE CLOSE on the potty training, which is DRIVING ME APE-SHIT. Daddy has made ONE half-hearted 4-hour attempt, and given up. The boy, delightful and precious though he may be, knows he can play Daddy like a cheap fiddle and get whatever he wants (not materialistically speaking, though, because we're BROKE). I know that being home ALL DAY LONG with a child would be tough... stressful... I don't know... I just know that there are things I might do differently if I were here, but if I try (and yes, I've been nice about it) to suggest these things, offer support or encouragement, whatever, it's seen as a direct insult to his parenting skills.

And the house is a MESS... and I'm EXHAUSTED by the time I get home from work... and there's NO TIME to exercise...

I'm so tired of feeling bitter, and frustrated, and agitated, and irritated by ALL of this, but I don't know what the solution is.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Birthday words for Teresa Paulina

My dear friend Teresa Paulina turns... ummm.... 29 today...
Ti Re Mi, you must remember...

Growing OLD is mandatory...

Growing UP is OPTIONAL!

Happy Birthday, dear friend!!!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Follow the link for some nifty Mother's Day give-a-ways...
If I win the hot-pink iPod Nano, I'm giving it to Twyla...


Oh, to be able to relax so totally and completely...

Monday, May 07, 2007

I really should apologize.
I posted that teaser about the counseling, then haven't had a chance since then to follow-up.  It really wasn't my intention to string you along all this time.  Why is it that the things you have to do always get in the way of things you want to do?  I hate that.  I'm sure you all understand…
And who posted a comment, then deleted it?  That's driving me ape-shit.
But I digress.
The counseling is going well, I think.  I realized early on that the husband views all of this as 'airing our dirty laundry' in public, but I think he's eased away from that somewhat.  We both like and feel very comfortable with the counselor, so that makes a big difference.
When time permits, I promise I will post more.

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

You're just itching to know how the counseling's going, aren't you?